Change

I've got a really good reason for the recent lack of posting, so good that ever other reason I've given before seems remarkably dull and inconsequential in comparison. And that's about all the lead-in I can think of. Better brace yourself for some big news.

I found out last Monday that I'm pregnant.

And now I can't think of a way to transition into the post about how that news has been impacting my life. I guess I better get the basics out of the way first: Mark and I have been planning for Junior's arrival for a while now, so we're absolutely thrilled and as prepared as anyone can be for this sort of thing; our families are extremely excited, giving us lots of fun phone calls and well-wishes and warm-fuzzies all over the place; everything seems normal and healthy at the moment; and I'm due October 3 (date definitely subject to change). This child will be the first grandchild for both Mark's parents and mine. The first great-grandchild for both my mother's and father's parents, and I believe for Mark's mother's. I'm pretty sure the first great-great-grandchild for my grandmother's mother. And I suppose now's as good a time as any to mention that when I had a free psychic reading done a couple months ago at the same shop that sports all the great Amy Brown stuff, I was told that I would have twins by the end of 2005. Of course, we're waiting for Baby's First Sonogram before we start buying double.

The immensity of this change is at once both joyfully and terrifyingly overwhelming. The physical impact of this change hit me hard last week. I was up all night with acid reflux and insomnia, one night only getting a grand total of 30 minutes sleep. I stayed at home Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday, trying to figure out just what kind of food my stomach was going to prefer and seeing about getting at least a few hours sleep here and there. The stomach fun lasted into the weekend, making it impossible for me to do anything but sit in bed and crochet Baby's First Blanket (I'm halfway done, thanks to the ickiness last week). Things have been pretty good physically this week. My stomach likes the morning routine I've set up for it and is pretty happy with the food for the rest of the day. I make sure to eat something just before I go to bed to last me through the night, and I now sleep sitting up, so the acid reflux is minimal. I'm still pretty tired, I've got to deal with a propensity to be a lot warmer than I'm used to, and then there's the whole "I didn't think I could ever pee this much" issue. Mentally, wow. Having most of last week off was both good and bad. Good because it gave me a chance to sit back and go "This is HUGE!" and actually start to absorb the life-altering reality of being pregnant. Bad because I was so far removed from my normal routine of work and basic health, that the change got a bit too overwhelming at times and I felt like I would never feel "normal" again.

I actually looked forward to work this week. I wanted to get back into a regular pattern of living and start weaving this new piece of my life into that. It worked very well this week. It also helps that the Powers That Be at work finally figured out that it would be a Bad Thing to keep making me do my current job without acknowledging that it's far beyond my original job description. So they're going to update my job description and check with HR to figure out if I should have a new title or salary. That's a load off my mind. And it makes the frustrations of the DDJ easier to handle. I don't care if my new duties don't warrant a raise (which I really think they will)--I just wanted the acknowledgement that I'm not doing what I was hired to do.

Now the big task is to weave writing into this new situation even better than I had before. I'm pushing my way through some Masque blocks, and sticking to as much of my writing routine as possible. I'm still planning on finishing a draft of this book by the Pikes Peak Writers Conference. 2005 is definitely going to be an interesting year.